The Occult Thing Worth More to Trump Than $83.3 Million

Trump couldn’t just journal or try a mindfulness app or self-regulate with cannabis. So he insulted a woman he raped to the worldwide internet and now, in the defamation lawsuit that wrapped Friday, he is out $83.3 million for his yapping.

But he’s appealing. Yes, I know. But while the appeal is underway he still has to pony up 8,300,000 smackeroos to the court—or, dealer’s choice, he can come up with the deposit and collateral for a bond. But a bond is like a mortgage; he’d have to sweet-talk a bank into giving it to him. And that might be hard for a man currently in a financial peril so vertiginous that we’d minimize it with the word “dire.”